a necromancer's dream

[meganerd]

dead but not dead gays

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Dorian Pavus | OTA

[flashystyle]

[ahem]

[ cullen's role in the evacuation of haven was simple: get the refugees through the secret path and out to safety while the inquisitor and some of the others dealt with corypheus. that's all he had to do, that's all he was ordered to do... but he couldn't do it. He passed the buck on to Leliana halfway through the path, quickly saying something about having to go back — I cannot just leave her — before darting off in the opposite direction.

what happened next was a blur, his memories scattered now as he trudged through the snow. a hand on the inquisitor's back, a shout for her to run, dragons fire burning hot against his skin — followed so closely by the unbearable, suffocating cold of the snow that fell from the mountains beyond the small village. and finally... the sweet embrace of unconsciousness.

he had awoken, much to his surprise, dazed and chilled to the bone with nothing but snow for miles. winds so fast they pricked his skin like tiny needles. he had been a faithful man, so loyal to the chantry for so many years and though his faith was shaken as roughly as the earth had been not so long ago, he still prayed. Is this what the faithful were given upon death, if that is what it was at all? No, this couldn't be it. He had to be alive... though for how long that would last, Cullen couldn't say.

But he kept moving, following lights in the distance, using baser instincts to try and find his way to civilization. For days he continued until he finally stumbled upon a small village — nothing familiar, no faces of the inquisition, but a warm fire and a helping hand were good enough for now. some elderly woman cared for him, talking about what she heard of haven, spoke of nonsensical things he couldn't care less about. and this? this lasted for weeks and he thought, maybe he would just stay here forever.

Until word of the Inquisition came. They had found a new home — Skyhold, it was called, and Cullen made haste to get there. When he arrived, he looked quite different than he did back in haven — his face significantly more scruffy than it had been, his armor all but gone after all those weeks of searching in the snow (and, maker, that old woman was sweet but she could not clean armor worth a damn), his hair long and growing - somehow - even curlier than before. but the guards outside the door still recognized him; let him in without a second thought and cullen beelined for the mainhall.

once inside, he fell to his knees, the weight of everything falling off his shoulders. he was home, where he belonged. finally. ]

[flashystyle]

[Dorian almost didn't recognize the man arriving into Skyhold. Sure, he'd spent quite a bit of time embarrassing Cullen around Haven, but how was he to know that "rather handsome soldier" was going to arrive looking like that? How was he supposed to know he'd arrive at all?

He was out on the ramparts when the commotion started. Inquisitor members came running, as well as Cullen's fellow advisers. Varric might have joked with him, Josephine might have gotten teary-eyed, and the Inquisitor most certainly embraced him tightly and told him he couldn't leave them again.

When Dorian reached him? He looked furious.] What were you thinking?! Oh, yes, I'll just go face Corypheus and his Archdemon for the Inquisitor! Surely-- Surely it'll be alright!

[ahem]

[ everything feels like a dream. the warmth of the main hall, lit so beautifully by candles and adorned with the flag of the inquisition upon the banisters. the call of familiar voices practically singing with joy at the sight of him — of him of all people, just because they never expected to see him again after everything that happened at haven.

varric's teasing is met with horse, tired laughs. josephine's tears with assurances that he's alright — better than he has been in months. and the inquisitor's embrace with an awkward squeeze around her middle, and a promise that he wouldn't; he couldn't do that again.

it's all so nice and then — and then, he should have known that someone would not be so excited to see him. that anger was a perfectly reasonable response to the stupid thing he did. ]

I — [ uncertain, cullen instinctively tenses as he locks his eyes with dorian's. ] I did what I had to do, Dorian, you know that. [ then, his expression softens, voice lowering. he feels terribly for having put them all through this — and though he is surprised that dorian is so upset about it... he can't exactly blame him. ] I'm sorry.

[flashystyle]

Do I know that?! Did you do what you had to do, or what you wanted, Cullen?! [Dorian is just as surprised he's so upset about it. It wasn't as if they spent too much time together in Haven. It wasn't as if he'd had enough to really consider him. It wasn't as if he were starting to get attached—

Well, he was. The Inquisition was a home he didn't have in Tevinter. Cullen's absence had left them in shambles.] Facing this is what the Inquisitor was destined to do, not the Commander. Do you think it would be any less of a blow to the Inquisition if it were you to pass over her? Whether you like it or not, your life is worth something now! You can't leave the two of them to advise the Inquisitor, you can't leave your men without your discipline, you can't—

[He took a breath.] You certainly can't come back here looking no better than a Ferelden mutt with those sorry eyes! You're— You're a mess!

[ahem]

I did what was necessary for the Inquisition! [ to his surprise, cullen finds his voice raising slightly with each word. who was dorian to scold him like this? he didn't know what was going through his head those weeks ago back in haven, what thoughts pushed him to do something so, admittedly, stupid in the heat of the moment. ]

There is only one Herald of Andraste, last I remember. Finding a suitable replacement for a military commander would be difficult, but not impossible — not with the notoriety of the order now. But without her, without the Inquisitor... [ it would have been so much worse. he couldn't have risked it, he knew that then and he knows it now.

cullen looks away, cheeks flushed with both anger and embarrassment. ] It was never my intention to cause such grief. Nor did I plan on returning in such a sorry state.

[flashystyle]

It isn't about losing a military commander, it— it was about losing you! You, specifically! What part about that don't you understand?! You're too important to everyone to carry yourself with that attitude! Maker, you're infuriating!

[Dorian exhaled through his nose, averting his gaze to onlookers around the hall. The majority had gone silent since they started arguing. Varric was probably writing it down.]

... The very least you can do is allow me to groom that thick head of yours. Elsewhere.

[ahem]

[ cullen's brows furrow, less in anger and more in consternation now as he repeats dorian's words over and over in his mind. losing him? no, he wasn't so important — his death would be an acceptable loss if it had come down to it. they would have — they did rebuild without him, here in skyhold. dorian was being dramatic.

but the looks he had been given, the warm greetings from his friends as soon as they saw him; dorian's righteous anger... it all proved the mage right. people did care, and cullen was having an stupidly hard time accepting that.

so he says nothing on that particular matter, clamps his mouth shut and sighs, defeated. ]

If the alternative is you chasing me through the hold with a blade, then I suppose I have little choice. [ a joke? amazing. ]

[flashystyle]

I might just do that if you go off doing anything stupid again. [He's still bitter, but... well, it's enough to crack a smile. Truly amazing.

In fact, he's smiling the entire time he approaches and drags Cullen out by the arm. So is Varric. He knows.] When was the last time you've even seen a pair of scissors? If your hair got any curlier I'd mistake you for a druffalo.

[ahem]

I have no intention of doing so. [ not for a while anyway.

a part of cullen thinks to resist, considers the implications of letting dorian pull him so willingly through the hold and knows he probably shouldn't allow it. but he's tired, and maker knows he needs his hair cut and styled properly before it consumes his head.

that, and he doesn't particularly mind it. everyone just saw them arguing, heard him agree to do this. if they talk, well, he couldn't stop them anyway. ]

Not since Haven. The only choice I had was to ask the old woman that took me in — and her fingers trembled so much I feared she might take my ear off. [ he reaches up with his free hand now, sliding fingers through the mussed locks. his cheeks tinge pink. ] Is it really that bad?

[flashystyle]

It's not too bad, but we don't want anyone getting distracted by your golden locks. [Dorian rolled his eyes, walking out the front of Skyhold. He only slowed to start pointing out locations as they were mentioned.] Your office was meant to be just up there. I suspect Cassandra will have everything arranged so you can actually use it. Don't worry, you won't be kicking any poor sods out. There's the tavern-- you'll fine me there-- and... [And...

Since they don't actually tell us where tf some people sleep, Dorian's going to talk his way all the way to his quarters. It's surprisingly more barren than one would expect, aside from the bed, his tools and mirrors, and clothes. Maybe a Tevinter drapes here and there from the Inquisitor.]

Make yourself comfortable; this will take awhile. I settle for nothing short of perfection.

[ahem]

[ almost in unison, cullen rolls his eyes as well at the comment, muttering about how he doubts they would be distracted by anything good. his hair is so unruly, and it's not like he could have done anything with it back at that old lady's house in that tiny, poor village. at least he had the decency to pull it back into a ponytail to look semi reasonable for now. ]

It's an impressive fortress. I wish I had been here to witness its discovery. [ he looks toward the tower that is meant to be his office, and he wonders how long they held out the hope that he would be found. Would they have just left it there, empty and disheveled, even if he wound up dead and gone forever? It's a depressing thought, and one Cullen tries to will away with a fervent shake of his head.

Before long they reach Dorian's quarters and he wonders again if it's too late to decline. It sure is, seeing as he's already halfway into the room by the time he thinks of opening his mouth to say it. It's too late, he's trapped. shit. ]

Of course. [ and he would expect nothing less from dorian. good to see nothing has changed. he decides to sit on the bed because the only other option he has is the floor, or awkwardly leaning against the wall and, well, that wouldn't be very conducive to getting his hair cut, would it? ] And you've... done this before, correct?

[flashystyle]

Don't sound so nervous, commander. [Dorian looked over his shoulder at him, not even trying to hide his amusement. Shaking his head, he turned his attention gathering his things with a chuckle.] Who do you think has been maintaining my looks? Sera? Blackwall?

[After a moment of thought, he realizes that's not an idea he'd even like to joke about. He'll keep his door locked and the razors hidden when they're done.] No, I've done this many times before. The only difference is that I won't have the fortune of staring at myself. You, however, are a lucky man.

[It wasn't long before he was approaching with his hands full. His scissors and razors were packed neatly in a case, almost as clean as the day he'd bought them. He had a fresh sheet slung over his other arm, where he held a comb and a smaller, opening and closing mirror. He was ready.] As much as I'd love cleaning your hair off my bed, I'll ask you to keep this around you.

Trahearne | OTA

[thefirstbloom]

[galesong]

Puts this here to tell u to write a gay starter

writes a bi starter

[thefirstbloom]

[For all intents and purposes, Trahearne should have been dead. News had spread of Mordremoth's defeat, with the Marshal's disappearance to ensure the dragon would never rise again. All those who bear witness did not gave no details, and no one dared bother the Commander in their grief.

In actuality, Trahearne hadn't died with the Mordremoth. He spent many weeks catamose, under the surveillance of menders and order members alike. It would not do them well to let it come out that he could be carrying the seed of an Elder Dragon. When he finally woke, there was a number of Priory members "taking leave." They would never disclose where they were going.

Until the day they chose to move him into the Priory. The higher-ups were well aware the firstborn was going to be remaining with them until further notice, but anyone of Lioriley's rank were yet to be informed when he arrived. Wrapped in a cloak, Vigil members escorted him through the hall and left him to finally free roam.

He found himself heading directly for his and Lioriley's corner of the library, ignoring the scholars he passed. He should have explained himself to them. He just didn't care for anything else but finding her.]

fair

[galesong]

[ to say the past few weeks had been difficult would be a massive understatement. lioriley was an optimistic woman, and she had been hopeful for trahearne's return for those first couple of days after mordremoth's defeat. no one had outright said he had died, just that his body hadn't been found yet — there was still a chance he could be out there; hurt, maybe, but safe and alive.

but weeks went by, and slowly her resolve dwindled. no more word had come, no one said anything, no one updated her on the status of their search. and if they had found anything at all (and apparently, they did) she was surely the last to know of it. hope faded, and she was left admitting to herself that trahearne had probably gone for good.

when that realization came, the young sylvari had taken to hiding herself away in the library. before, she could be pulled away for practically anything — an excursion out in the wilds, a friend asking her to help them with a lesson, or just someone insisting that she sleep somewhere besides the floor of the library. but now... now she was immovable. all she did was read — or it looked like she was reading, when in actuality she was just staring mindlessly at the words on the page; thinking not of the story before her, but of stories trahearne had told her long before.

seeing shadows out of the corner of her eyes was not a strange occurrence; especially not after how long she had been sitting in the corner of the library these past few weeks. sometimes she thought she saw him, like a ghost haunting — no, taunting — her with the idea that he might return to her. she had since come to ignore those apparitions, they were always gone the moment she turned her head anyway.

so when she sees something now, she thinks it might just be another one of them; or another priory member wandering through the library. she pays trahearne little mind as her eyes remain focused on the book propped on her knees. she looks utterly exhausted. ]

[thefirstbloom]

[Trahearne didn't approach her right away, instead taking in the sight of her. Oh, he never imagined he'd be able to lay eyes on her again. If he had a heart it'd be beating out of his chest.

He steps in calmly and quietly, hesitating as he began to realize she didn't look all that well. Frowning, he walked towards her from the side and knelt down, wordlessly wrapping his arms around her and laying his head on hers.]

You haven't been taking care of yourself, dearheart.

[galesong]

[ an illusion, and a cruel one at that to linger for so long on the edge of her vision. lioriley seems to retreat further into the shadows of the corner, almost afraid of the ghost that haunts her with visions of her dead lover. this one is going further than any others, touching her — and she thinks it should go through her and vanish but it doesn't.

then, he speaks, and the world that seemed so dark and hopeless fills with a light she thought had been extinguished months ago. the word dearheart echos in her mind and her eyes flicker upward, catching sight of the man she thought to be a dead for so long now. a hand, shaking, reaching up to touch his arm. it's him, he's here, she's not dreaming. ]

T...Trahearne? [ her voice is small, hesitant. her fingers curl against his leaves. don't be a ghost. ]

[thefirstbloom]

I'm here, Lioriley. It's alright. [He speaks softly, as of fearing too strong of a presence would scare her off. He places his hands at her sides and offers the warmest smile he could muster.] I've missed you so much. I'm sorry I couldn't come sooner.

[He spends a moment just wanting her face. It'd been so long since he'd seen her in person, and the dragon was sure to try and twist everything he loved. Especially who he loved most. But she was here, and she was as he left her. She was safe.] I-I'm so sorry.

[galesong]

[ she goes through an impressive variety of emotions in those few seconds where he watches her: fear, confusion, sadness, hope, joy, — ending in a wide-eyed, tear filled gaze as she hones in on him. it's really him, he really came back and she can feel him touching her.

now, the young sylvari leans forward to wrap her arms around his neck, ]

It is you. You came back. How did — [ no, it didn't matter how or why or anything else. all that mattered was that he had come back to her. the tears fall now, and she clutches him tight as she buries her face in his neck, taking in the familiar scent of him that seemed to vanish before now — like she couldn't quite recall it in her memories. ] Oh, my love, I thought I would never see you again. Please do not go again, [ she sobs, loud and her voice cracks but she doesn't care, ] Please do not leave me again.

[thefirstbloom]

I will not leave you for all the stars in the sky. [Trahearne sits back on the floor, pulling her into his lap and resting his head on hers. He wouldn't let her see him cry. This was about her comfort.

He knew there weren't any words to relieve the pain she'd been through, so he held her tight and rubbed her back to reaffirm he was there. He was staying.] I will not be going anywhere without you again, dearheart. I love you. I have always loved you.

[galesong]

[ the tears do not stop, her tiny body shuddering with sobs as she curls up tightly in his lap. ]

I — I love you, too. [ she manages, whispering the words quietly — just loud enough for him to hear with her face still shoved against his neck. his shoulder will be soaked soon, but she can't bring herself to worry about such a minute detail when all she can think about is him; and how wonderful it feels to be in his arms again. safe.

he might not want her to see him cry, but lioriley doesn't think twice when she finally lifts her head up — her own face stained with tears that seem to never cease. a both hands rest on his cheeks, steadying him just so she can lean up and press their lips together. ] I have missed you so much. [ she whispers between kisses, ] The world was so dark without you, Trahearne. I will never let you go.

[thefirstbloom]

[He doesn't put up any resistance when she touches him, leaning into her hands with choked laughter been kisses. Oh, this is what the world had to offer him after all he'd been through. A sore body, and the guilt of ever leaving her in the first place crashing down all at once.]

I never wanted to leave you. [He returns each kiss with his own, ignoring how wet both their faces must be from their tears.] I was such a fool, I'm so sorry... I'm so sorry.

[galesong]

No. [ she says insistently, her fingers brushing under his eyes to try and wipe away the tears. too late for that, but the sentiment is the same. ] Please, do not apologize to me. I know not the details of what you did, but I know they were nothing but honorable; done with the intention of saving all of those in Tyria. You should not apologize for being a hero.

[ of course it hurt, and losing him felt like losing a part of her own soul. but in the end... she would never blame him for that, even if he never came back to her. ] It is alright. You are here now, you are safe... I will not let any harm come to you again, dearheart. I swear it.